Do you think it is rude for a FAMILY MEMBER to ask who you are voting for?

Question

Sorry to yell the family member part, but I am torn on whether this conversation between my mom and I should have even happened. She asked me who I was voting for and I told her. After that she said "I can't talk to you anymore" then she pretended to be kidding and made a comment about me being rich so I didn't care. I am not rich, I wish. But I know she has assumed that for a while because my dh owns his own small business, who happens to be struggling like everyone else right now. Anyway, I originally thought since she was family it was okay for her to get so personal. But, since she didn't like my answer, and reacted the way she did, I wish I would have just said none of her business. I guess there is more to this than a political thing (family issues lol), so final ? Is it ever okay to ask someone who you are voting for?

Answer 1

It is okay to ask, and to engage people in a discussion about it, so long as you use tact and civility.



Some people are very private with their political beliefs, just like some people are with their spiritual beliefs.



A little restraint and empathy goes a long way towards opening up a dialogue.

Answer 2

It's OK for a family member to ask, but you shouldn't feel obligated to answer. You could say I rather not say. As for a your mother goes, it sounds like she may have reared you to be a free thinker and if this is so, you can remind her of this.



On the other hand, minus the "rich" dig, she may have felt that since she is voting for someone else it is best not to get into a discussion.



Concerning the "rich" dig I think your mom was out of line. I don't think you should have to apologize for being able to afford to live comfortably and it certainly isn't anyone's business, including your moms, the amount of your family's net worth.

Answer 3

Don't sweat it. One more week and the tide changes and we go with who ever gets in. She still loves you but this is very emotional for many.

Me included.



We all feel we are right and are picking the right guy. We want support from every one we know and love. We don't understand it if we disagree because we are friends, family and neighbors.



So next time just say I am voting for the best man (or Women) and leave it at that.

Answer 4

My whole family is from the old school and they never tell anyone who they vote for. My guess is McCain, but they would never tell anyone and that is their right. I wouldn't even ask, because they would feel I was asking something that is personal and it was none of my business. They've always been this way

Answer 5

Wait, don't tell me. You're mother's a democrat. No, really, all seriousness aside, I don't think asking someone how they'll vote is rude. However, their reaction to the answer could be, as in your mother's case.



This used to be a free country where you had a right to vote however you wished without being criticized and ostracized for it, but that's all changing ('Change We Can Believe In').

Answer 6

I think it is very important. This issues should be talked about, argued, and debated in the family. The problem is not asking the question, it is the answer.



People are entitled to their opinion and to vote as they please. My example would be the McCain supports who think liberals will be the end for the U.S. As a very liberal person I welcome the chance to discuss the matter with my family and friends. I expect their respect since I do not want to overthrow the government. It is up to us to have civil discourse.

Answer 7

Who you vote for and how much money you make use to be 2 things that were TABOO in general conversation. But we've all gotten noisy and for some it seems okay to do in person. It can be very uncomfortable and I hope that one day we go back to have something be personal and not have EVERYTHING be so public.

Answer 8

Moms like to think they raised their kids right,( to think like they do) .When they find out their kids have a mind of their own is when they should be proud they raised their kids right, I know, I am a mom and had this happen. I am just glad my kids are voting

Answer 9

I think you should always be able to talk to your family and friends about who you are voting for. Sometimes it gets ugly, but you never know who you may influence. Freedom of speech has a consequence.

Answer 10

If they really care about you, they already know. If someone does ask why don't you turn the question around and ask them if they have missed any presidential elections in their lifetimes....What they thought about the Truman-Dewey election? How did they feel about Goldwater?

Woodrow Wilson said that if you can't answer one question, answer another.

Answer 11

Well, especially if you answer and they say,"I can't talk to you anymore." That IS rude, even if it is a joke. She must lose a lot of friends that way.



I usually always say, "I'm open to both candidates, convince me of your candidate if you can."

Answer 12

Me and my mom are both voting for McCain but i told her i was voting for Obama and we had an argument over it. i was defending obama the whole time and it ticked her off. but to answer your question, who you vote for is nobody business and family complicates things.

Answer 13

I think it's fine for people to ask who you are voting for. Now it's your personal choice to share it. If they don't like your choice, don't worry about it.

Answer 14

It's not rude unless they are not going to like your answer, in which case you should reply "That's between me and the ballot box"

Answer 15

No its never good to tell someone who you are voting for because there is always a problem with either your candidate or their candidate....

Answer 16

It is okay to ask. It is also perfectly okay to say it is personal and you don't want to talk about it.

Answer 17

no problem asking. but if your old enough to vote, she should respect your opinion and live with it! she asked!

Answer 18

Of course it's ok to ask. It's also ok to politely refuse to answer.

Answer 19

I'm glad when anybody wants to know what I think.

Answer 20

I suppose a little bit, but it can be expected though.

Answer 21

Just say you haven't decided yet. That's what I do.

Answer 22

Well, yeah, it is. But she should respect your opinion, even if she doesn't agree with it.

Answer 23

Just threaten to send her to a dingy old age home with burly nurses and dirty floors.

Answer 24

How is it rude?